The (Young) Woman I Wanted to Be

A year ago today I moved to New York. I was in a very different place, physically and even more mentally. I followed my passions to the concrete jungle, expecting adulthood to just fall into place if I was in the right place at the right time. 

But as fate would have it, the universe said no and sent thunderstorms my way. I had to rebuild myself from the ground up: my career, my values, my goals, my identity. 

Somewhere along the way I stumbled into where I am now, and at some point in the last few months, while devouring chips for dinner and watching YouTube videos in bed, I realized I'm not a child anymore. It's time to grown the f*ck up. 


I quit social media (namely, Instagram), and for the first time in a long time, started to redefine myself through my own eyes by my own standards. No longer comparing myself to others, I took notice of my own life's highlights (like cooking my first well-balanced meal, starting a new skincare routine, making my first salad, getting a library card, etc...) These are the little things I'm most proud of and the only person I care about sharing it with is myself. Because consistently doing these things and caring for myself is the best thing I can ever do for me.

Being an adult is balancing all the things. It's prioritizing and making time for things, because all we have is 24 hours a day. What can I accomplish? What can I work towards? What have I been skimping on that I need to start doing now? 

🧘🏻 Learning to prioritize health: Sleeping on time, taking care of my skin, setting realistic gym goals, eating well, learning to cook, learning about food, and then being appalled at the amount of frozen potstickers and Hot Pockets I lived off of in college.

👩🏻‍🎨 Building a career: Redefining my goals, finding my voice in the workplace, continuing to learn, create, and work my way up.

👛 Financially: Finally getting to spend on things that are important — quality food, my OWN furniture, clothing that doesn't come from thrift stores or outlet malls. IT. FEELS. SO. NICE. To have money to start building the life I want.

📚 Free time: Learning to not overpack my schedule, saying no to things I don't want to do, reading more books, visiting friends who live more than a skip, hop, and a jump away, being okay with spending time alone (and actually enjoying it), and building a relationship with myself instead of relying on others to define me. 

These are just a couple of things I've been really proud to do at this stage in my life. And there's always so much I want to accomplish and improve on. But I need to step back and appreciate where I am now - a young woman, imperfect but happy.

So happy.